


B Sides

by eyrist



Series: Melodies of The Soul [3]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, F/F, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, drabbles?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:33:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23530888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eyrist/pseuds/eyrist
Summary: Other songs that ring true alongside the main album. The tales left untold yet worth exploring.
Relationships: Akechi Goro & Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro & Persona 5 Protagonist, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Melodies of The Soul [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693363
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	1. Fortnight

**Author's Note:**

> in the midst of a fortnight of uncertainty, he lays next to his lover(?) and contemplates the future.

Maybe, if he closes his eyes hard enough, he’ll start to believe it.

The chill air of the night had arisen goosebumps upon the little skin he hadn’t buried beneath the soft, grey blanket. The distant noises of the red light district at the time it was most alive roared off somewhere beyond the window, like faint afterthoughts next to the quiet, constant hum of the air conditioner. The warmth that pressed against his body was not unfamiliar but, while all in the same breath, it was both comforting and terrifying.

It started with one thought, really—just a few words echoed into his mind by his own voice—until he’d tossed and turned them around so many times that they weren’t just _words_ anymore; Until they grew into a very real, very tangible fear that planted itself right within his chest and writhed uncomfortably against his heart.

 _What am I doing?_

He finds his eyes drawn to the body next to his, asleep with breaths too shallow and hair falling over his eyes. He always looked so pretty when he slept (so calm and peaceful as he hid away from the rest of the world underneath the sheets) and the very thought just makes the anxiety even more restless.

 _What am I doing?_ , he asks himself, for maybe the fiftieth time since he’d laid down. He’d been unmoving for God knows how long, and he’s pretty sure that his muscles have already cramped over to be felt until the next morning, but he stays still. He can’t wake the other up.

He needs to be alone with his thoughts, even as it seemed that it was doing more harm than good. He wonders if that’s for the best, a sort of early punishment that he wouldn’t deny he more than deserved at this point, for all the pain he’s caused. (Or _will_ cause, he reminds himself.) 

What could he do to atone for the sins he’s committed?

_What am I doing?_

This time, it comes to him in the form of a beratement. He’s not sure how many seconds, or minutes, or hours have passed by, but at some point, he began condemning himself to the deepest abysses of his thoughts, drowning himself in the words he knew would be thrown at him the exact moment the truth is spilled.

_What am I doing?_

Again, the question that looped in his head, taunting him, _pushing_ him. He thinks that maybe he’s doing the right thing, but why is there a burning ache in his chest whenever his eyes cast over to the other’s sleeping form? What is this fear that’s burrowed itself so deeply into his core, latched onto his very soul like a bug?

_What am I doing?_

He doesn’t know when, but after some time, he realises the other isn’t actually asleep. He thinks that they both know they’re playing this charade of ignorance, but there was a balance between them that didn’t dare to be tipped. Neither of them wanted to move, and so move, they did not.

_What am I doing?_

He thinks that maybe pretending to be asleep would appease the other, convince him that he was just having a nightmare come morning— But they both know it’s not the entire truth. They know each other far too well for that.

_What am I doing?_

He reasons that this is only normal, that there’s nothing wrong. That this is completely _fine_.

_What am I doing?_

He feels the hand around his hip pull him just a bit closer.

_What am I doing?_

He feels puffs of warm breath hit his cheek.

_What am I doing?_

He feels a thumb brush against it.

When he slowly, so very hesitantly, peeks his eyes open to peer over to the side, he finds his breath caught in his throat in a small gasp— A gasp to the softness of his gaze, to the concern spelled in the furrow of his brows and the downturn of his lips.. It was enough to make him squeeze his eyes shut once more.

He can’t take that. It just felt so _wrong_. Why did it _still_ feel so _wrong_? Why did he still feel too far gone to accept him with a clear conscience? He wills the image away as if it were some sleep-deprived mirage, something his tired imagination saw in a trick of the light.

He didn’t see the concern in those beautiful eyes. He didn’t see the tears that bubbled from the corners of his eyes. He didn’t see the same fear mirrored in his gaze.

And he knows the other wills the image of him away just as much, knows that it’s not something that they want to discuss any time soon. Both the gods from above and the demons dwelling below knew that they were testing the waters, finding some semblance of footing in the thread-thin tightrope they crossed, but there was still so much that the other didn’t know. It didn’t feel fair. It _wasn’t_ fair.

And again, he asks himself.

_What am I doing?_

_Not making another mistake_ , his mind offers.

He wants to believe it.

Maybe, if he closes his eyes hard enough, he’ll start to believe it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HE Y LMAO  
> so i know that update of m&m is w a y overdue but here's a thing i've been planning for s o long now haha  
> i've had the idea of b sides in mind since just a few days after i began writing the main fic, but i wanted to save it up until a good chunk of the story is out there-- and that finally kinda happened, so here it is finally !!  
> to explain, b sides is just a whole buncha side stories alongside mixing and matching  
> it's the stuff i couldn't put into the main fic but also kinda really wanted to write too ?? in a way this is just me indulging in the au i've written lmao
> 
> updates schedule for this is still kinda vague bc it i s just for side stories and all, but i have some ideas already !! if you've ever wanted to know what happened in the main fic from a different perspective or anything, feel free to leave that in a comment !
> 
> [twitter's](https://twitter.com/relictionism) where i usually yell about writing and the struggles and all, so check that out if you wanna know how updates are coming along ?  
> and i have a [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/eyrist) too if there are questions you want answered !
> 
> with that, i hope you had a good read on the first (of many) b sides !
> 
> listen list !!  
> cigarettes after sex - opera house


	2. Lose Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The other side of the coin, twisting and spinning on dirty wooden floors and amongst a sea of dancing shadows.

The music was never too loud. In fact, it was never loud _enough_.

Even as yells and melodies shouted into his ears amongst the club, it wasn’t enough; Even as he felt the bass shake him to his very core, it wasn’t enough; Losing himself in the midst of bodies that were swept into the music just as he was, was maybe the closest he’d always get to that peak, that _apex_. The darkness that cloaked them made it easy for him not to see who was who, where was where, for all he really focused on was dancing his heart out.  
He focused on moving his hips, his arms— closed his eyes as he shook his head and laughed into the air, the sound never reaching above all the delicious noise that clouded his mind and body. Ever so often, there would be a streak of red floating above them, bathing them in its crimson glow, and he (for just a quick second) got a glimpse of the party roaring around him.

That fuelled him to dance harder, shout louder, _lose himself_.

Maybe he was too intoxicated for his own good. _Maybe_ he had a little too much to drink. He didn’t care. All he cared about was how the music blaring around them (the heavy bass making his heart shake, the strings of melodies flowing into each other) guided his movements into a dance of sensuality, confidence, _life_.

He felt _alive_.

He knew there were eyes on him now, knew that some had tried to wrap their hands around him and grind against his body— but he was good at evading them, good at keeping it all _see_ and no _touch_. There was only one person in this entire building who he would allow to touch him however he so pleased, grind hips against his and press as close as he wanted to, and that person stood above them all, his face split in a wide, bright grin and his eyes reflecting the red of his equipment’s lights, the adrenaline and high just _bleeding_ throughout this club swimming within his dark irises.

The exact moment he cast his eyes up at the illuminated stage, was the exact moment they’d locked gazes.

_I know you’re watching me and I love it._

He had to have gotten that message across, with hands running over his body and his lips curled into an inviting smirk. Maybe it was the haze of drunkenness clouding his brain, but as he watched the DJ stare down at him, he caught something that was akin to a hint of _desire_ swirling within his eyes.

There was always a surge of pride and energy blooming within him whenever he caught Joker’s stare, a voice in the back of his head praising him for being able to snag his gaze with just the movement of his body alone— and well, Goro Akechi was no narcissist, but he could admit he had a top-tier ass and eyes that could kill.

And maybe just to leave the other man hanging—a sort of _punishment_ for taking so long to shove Goro into the back of a bathroom stall and _fuck him_ already—he slithered away from the crowd and back into his and Ann’s seats after the song ended, getting a beer on his way there to refresh and replenish his levels, before Ann joined him once more and they were gone.

As he climbed that last step up from the club, he found his gaze drawn to the twisted, red neon spelling “ _The Metaverse_ ” that hung above the entrance, a smirk on his lips and a twinkle in his eyes.

He’ll play hard to get just a little longer, but that was drunken Goro speaking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is goro pov from track 02 LMAO 
> 
> idk y'all i just got hit with the vision of dark shadows and red lights in the middle of a crowd and i H A D TO WRITE THIS SMKSMKSMKS
> 
> listen list !!  
> you got that remix


End file.
